irish Jokes

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Dave Allen on Directions in Ireland
I suppose Ireland is the best place in the world for directions. People will say to you "I wouldn't start from here if I were you." I was driving to Wicklow town and outside Wicklow town there's a kind of country road and I came to a cross... more

Lenny Bruce on The Irish
The thing is, you have a choice of a judge or a jury. You're a smuck, if you ever take the judge, because the thing is you're going to tell him a story to convince him. What kind of s*** are you going to tell the judge that he hasn't already... more

Dave Allen on Irish Wakes
A very important part of the Irish way of life is death. See if anybody else anywhere else in the world dies that's the end of it they're dead but in Ireland when somebody dies we lay them out and watch them for a couple of days. It's called... more

Lenny Bruce - Are there any niggers here tonight?
What did he say? "Are there any niggers here tonight?" Jesus Christ, do you have to get that low for laughs? Have I ever told you about the schwartzer? Or spoke about the moulin john's? Are there any niggers? I know that one nigger that... more

Dave Allen on Religious School
First question they ask, what do you know about God? I didn't know anything about God, Who? "God!" Who's God? "God, you do not know who God is? Sister! Sister! We have an Atheist here!" "Let me tell you little boy, God is, God was, and... more