Home / Stewart Lee / Worcester Travelodge
I was in Worcester a couple of months ago. I got caught overnight. I had to stay there against my will. I went into the Travelodge, the Worcester Travelodge. I said, Have you got any rooms available here tonight in the Worcester Travelodge? And the Worcester Travelodge woman behind the counter in the Worcester Travelodge said, I don't know. I said, Hang on a minute. This is the Worcester Travelodge we're in now? She said, Yes. I said, You are the woman behind the counter in the Worcester Travelodge? She said, Thats correct. I said, Yet you're unable to tell me if there are rooms available in this building, the sole purpose of which is the commercial letting of rooms? She said, Thats right. I said, Thats all you need to know for your job. In fact, any other information might be superfluous. She said, That's the case. She said, I agree. But the whole things done by centralised bookings. You can only book a room by phoning up or through the internet. And I was absolutely furious momentarily. The sheer stupidity of a Travelodge where you are unable to book rooms at the counter in the Travelodge. I was incandescent with rage. Then I thought for a minute, Hang on. This is great. Because this is exactly the kind of thing a forty year old stand-up comedian should be writing material about. I thought, yeah, I might come at it from a bit of an oblique angle. You know, I might write a 70s-style comedy sketch where a bloke goes into a shop that sells only apples and says, Have you got any apples available? They say, I don't know. You'll have to ring the National Apple Office. You'd like to see that, wouldn't you? I hate the Travelodge. I'm a forty year old stand-up comedian and I hate the Travelodge. No-one wants to stay in the Travelodge by choice. It's always a last resort. No-ones thinking, Id love to stay in a room so blandly anonymous that it looks like the burial chamber of the king of an ancient civilisation which valued above all bland anonymity.
Stewart Lee, 2009
Suggested by Pete
Newsletter
Feed