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I remember when my older kid found mommies stash. I said "Mommy is involved in experimentations... with a natural substance... that comes off a plant, called THC". And my daughter said, "Yeah, you're giving us all this 'Just say no' shit and then you pull this. God mother, you're such a fucking hypocrite". So I said "Did you just come in here and use the f-word? In front of your own fucking mother? Don't you dare talk to me like that young lady. Mommy is the only person in this family allowed to be on drugs! Mommy is all that is successful, and has earned the right to be drunk or on drugs or a raving fucking maniac if she so chooses".
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Roseanne Barr, 2006
Suggested by Flotzy
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