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I deserve to win and I'll tell you why cause I'm the only person who will admit I will let it change my life, Ohh yes and how? I'll ring everyone up I know and say I don't want to know you any more OK. Bye. See we haven't had any fun winners that's what I hate about the Lottery in this country (UK) we've had no fun winners, we've had all these boring people who win, they find the most boring person in the world and they win it for some reason. "I'm just going to invest it, I'll probably save it for a rainy day... Um, I might buy a new Biro but apart from that." Give it back you twat, you don't know what you're doing do you? Fuck off. And you get these people. "Na, I'm just going to keep it secret, I'll just go back to work I suspect". Why? How long are you going to keep that secret? Hello John, did you have a good weekend? "Yes I fucking did... Ha ha ha." You'd have bought the company by the end of the day just for a laugh. "Now you've all got a pay raise except for you, cause you're the manager and from now on you've got to come in in your underpants, ha ha ha ha". We've had no fun winners, that's what I hate about it.
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Jack Dee, 1998
Suggested by AsslessWonder
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