Brian Regan on Flying - Comedy-Quotes.com

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Photo of Brian Regan How come the first class people they can just get on when ever they want? I've always hated that. "First class people board at your leisure, take your time first class people. Coach class people no sit scuz, no wait little piggies." So when you do get on the first class people they're already sitting there. They're all sprawled out in their big thrones. "Bring me the head of a pig. And a goblet of something cool and refreshing. Anyone have a fiddle? Make someone from coach fiddle for me. Amuse me." You're not even allowed to use their bathrooms. "The bathrooms up front are for our first class passengers The coach class bathrooms are located a Newark Airport. Concourse C." So when you do board the first class people they're sitting there, a lot of them are working as you're boarding, they have computers out and calculators they're looking up at you like "Hey we're making money right now... Right now we're making money. Go get in the back. Close that curtain, I don't wanna see em. Even in my peripheral. Uhh. Snap it, snap it shut!" What's the mater with us? They've got to cover us up with a tarp.