Bill Hicks on Snooker - Comedy-Quotes.com

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Show quote | Sign In to save your setting (remove disclaimer). Photo of Bill Hicks You ever sit around and see what's coming up on the news? Unbelievably depressing. This half hour, war, death, famine, AIDS, homeless, recession, depression, drought, flood, earthquake, riot and snooker highlights. Thank god we've got some fucking news coming up here. Riots, yeh, yeh, yeh where's the snooker? Earthquake? Yeh, yeh, yeh, yeh, yeh. Man, I don't get it. I turn on and I'm watching and the same two guys are playing when I was here (the UK) nine months ago. Is it the same fucking game. If you leave here tonight and think "Bill doesn't like snooker." You'll be wrong. But twenty four fucking hours a day? I get tired getting head that long man. I start looking at my match after an hour. The world snookers on. Let me watch it, come on. And I think I know the game and I think I've figured out why it takes so fucking long. It's cause of that guy with the white glove keeps taking the balls out and putting them back on. That bastard. Is he in a bad marriage? Does he not want to go home? To me if you get a ball in the pocket, good shot alright, not here comes white glove fucker. This game will never end. That's a little tedious y'know. I've figured out what snooker needs. Riots. Peep that game up a lot. Cue's going over peoples heads, stoning that white glove guy with the balls. "I ain't going home to her...". Get a divorce, let the fucking game end.
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